Ripveenbig is a god.

He takes the form of a large, wise hedgehog.

Ripveenbig created water two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ripveenbig, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Ripveenbig, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Ripveenbig's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Ripveenbig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about solid mechanics near ducks while wearing gray rings and balancing nine silver spheres on your hands.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Ripveenbig.

4. Never write about planets.

5. Erect a large copper sculpture of Ripveenbig on top of all buildings.