Fadbutnart is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, smart squid.

Fadbutnart created bats seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fadbutnart, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Fadbutnart, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Fadbutnart's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Fadbutnart's Holy Commandments

1. Manatees are not to be trusted.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Feed all hungry frogs.

4. Learn three new languages a year.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.