Vidshavyik is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, selfish butterfly.

Vidshavyik created matter nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Vidshavyik, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Vidshavyik, she will turn you into a slug.

Vidshavyik's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Vidshavyik's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never sing near voles.

3. Hide from purple eagles for they are unholy.

4. Never paint your feet red.

5. Never talk about thermodynamics.