Habsomsaw is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, unthoughtful hydra.

Habsomsaw created the planet Earth seven million years ago.

If you believe in Habsomsaw, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Habsomsaw, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Habsomsaw's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Habsomsaw's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Habsomsaw.

2. Never paint your neck magenta.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Habsomsaw.

4. Never talk about fluid mechanics near squirrels while wearing pink boots and balancing seven tin spheres on your legs.

5. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.