Fadzimnartwon is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, duplicitous cow.

Fadzimnartwon created the Cigar Galaxy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fadzimnartwon, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Fadzimnartwon, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Fadzimnartwon's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Fadzimnartwon's Holy Commandments

1. Never leap near ducks.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Pray towards the west.

5. Do not kill rats.