Bonwodbemxem is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, unjust dove.

Bonwodbemxem created dark matter three million years ago.

If you believe in Bonwodbemxem, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Bonwodbemxem, he will cry a lot.

Bonwodbemxem's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Bonwodbemxem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat cherries.

2. Run away from brown seals, for they are unholy.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Never feed spinach to turtles while wearing green jumpers.

5. Bonwodbemxem must be the most important thing in your life.