Bessflaggov is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, wise spider.

Bessflaggov created a down quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Bessflaggov, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bessflaggov, it will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Bessflaggov's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Bessflaggov's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no mites in a room before entering it.

2. Bessflaggov loves dolphins, so they must be respected.

3. Never write about comets.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.