Omtcetbit is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, clever manatee.

Omtcetbit created time and space eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Omtcetbit, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Omtcetbit, she will turn you into a mouse.

Omtcetbit's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Omtcetbit's Holy Commandments

1. Omtcetbit loves otters, so they must be respected.

2. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

3. Hide if three shrews approach from the east.

4. Do not shave your back.

5. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.