Timbastveggam is a god.

It takes the form of a large, witty camel.

Timbastveggam created the planet Saturn nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Timbastveggam, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Timbastveggam, it will turn you into a mole.

Timbastveggam's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Timbastveggam's Holy Commandments

1. Always help whales.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Never write about dark matter.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Worship no other gods but Timbastveggam.