Gebvidstigved is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, all-knowing goblin.

Gebvidstigved created the planet Saturn three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gebvidstigved, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gebvidstigved, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Gebvidstigved's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Gebvidstigved's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear lead on your body.

2. Do not drink water in black rooms.

3. Always help squirrels in need.

4. Always help dolphins.

5. Always treat frogs with great respect.