Davsintam is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, benevolent swan.

Davsintam created oxygen four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Davsintam, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Davsintam, he will turn you into a mole.

Davsintam's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Davsintam's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never wear blue scarves.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

4. Never think about electromagnetism near eagles while wearing mauve ear rings and balancing nine copper spheres on your hands.

5. Fast once a month.