Hasarnvonk is a god.
He takes the form of a massive, capable
raccoon.
Hasarnvonk created snails five quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Hasarnvonk, he will not care.
If you do not believe in
Hasarnvonk, he will turn you into a slug.
Hasarnvonk's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.
Hasarnvonk's Holy Commandments1. Respect your elders.
2. Always help turtles.
3. Your children must be taught to worship Hasarnvonk.
4. Never talk about galaxies.
5. Feed all hungry snails.