Fengamkip is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, compassionate elephant.

Fengamkip created an atom five million years ago.

If you believe in Fengamkip, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Fengamkip, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Fengamkip's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Fengamkip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Fengamkip's name in vain.

2. Do not kill cats.

3. Always wear orange.

4. Always obey Fengamkip's priests.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.