Jadfutmap is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, selfish fairy.

Jadfutmap created the solar system three billion years ago.

If you believe in Jadfutmap, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Jadfutmap, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Jadfutmap's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Jadfutmap's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Jadfutmap in the centre of the settlement.

2. You must never eat lentils.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.