Kamfaggep is a god.

She takes the form of a large, stupid gorilla.

Kamfaggep created a charm quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Kamfaggep, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Kamfaggep, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Kamfaggep's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Kamfaggep's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large iron sculpture of Kamfaggep on top of all buildings.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Always help sick monkeys.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Erect five copper sculptures of Kamfaggep on top of important buildings.