Flynegbif Sogmumnur is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, strong parrot.

Flynegbif Sogmumnur created the planet Earth seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flynegbif Sogmumnur, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Flynegbif Sogmumnur, he will turn you into a puffin.

Flynegbif Sogmumnur's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Flynegbif Sogmumnur's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from pink sheep, for they are unholy.

2. You must pray to Flynegbif Sogmumnur four times a day.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Erect a giant iron sculpture of Flynegbif Sogmumnur in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never write about bacteria.