Vancarten is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, amazing fly.

Vancarten created the planet Venus five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vancarten, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Vancarten, he will not invite you to parties.

Vancarten's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Vancarten's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Never eat carrots.

3. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Vancarten in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never hop in the presence of squirrels.

5. Never chant in holy places.