Hasvenkikdod is a god.

She takes the form of a large, boastful hippopotamus.

Hasvenkikdod created the planet Mars seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hasvenkikdod, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hasvenkikdod, she will be very sad.

Hasvenkikdod's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Hasvenkikdod's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about electromagnetism near aardvarks while wearing magenta jumpers and balancing six tin spheres on your arms.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force near swans while wearing cyan coats and balancing seven platinum spheres on your back.

4. Do not wear titanium on your body.

5. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.