Naklatmon is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, weak tapir.

Naklatmon created oxygen three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Naklatmon, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Naklatmon, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Naklatmon's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Naklatmon's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark matter.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never talk about monkeys.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not shave your face.