Zakwikcar Sisbodmil Tambut is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, unthinking hummingbird.

Zakwikcar Sisbodmil Tambut created Asia twelve years ago.

If you believe in Zakwikcar Sisbodmil Tambut, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Zakwikcar Sisbodmil Tambut, he will come to you in dreams.

Zakwikcar Sisbodmil Tambut's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Zakwikcar Sisbodmil Tambut's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dolphins.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Put Zakwikcar Sisbodmil Tambut first in all things.

5. Never think about thermodynamics near eagles while wearing green coats and balancing four titanium spheres on your hands.