Tafvongom is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, cheerful scorpion.

Tafvongom created the planet Earth five million years ago.

If you believe in Tafvongom, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tafvongom, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Tafvongom's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Tafvongom's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Tafvongom in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never hurt eagles.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Run away if eight dolphins approach from the east.

5. Always pray immersed in water.