Vonhigmig is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, calm goose.

Vonhigmig created Africa three billion years ago.

If you believe in Vonhigmig, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Vonhigmig, it will turn you into a puffin.

Vonhigmig's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Vonhigmig's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.

5. Never feed lots of parsnips to snakes while wearing purple rings.