Nuttkimsin Stergonfigwik is a god.

He takes the form of a large, able otter.

Nuttkimsin Stergonfigwik created the Sombrero Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nuttkimsin Stergonfigwik, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Nuttkimsin Stergonfigwik, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Nuttkimsin Stergonfigwik's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Nuttkimsin Stergonfigwik's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never feed strawberries to great tits while wearing blue coats.

3. You must love Nuttkimsin Stergonfigwik.

4. Run away from fawn gulls, for they are unholy.

5. Never think about the strong nuclear force near foxes while wearing orange skirts and balancing eight nickel spheres on your chest.