Sterjen Gadcutdim is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, annoying crane.

Sterjen Gadcutdim created the world five billion years ago.

If you believe in Sterjen Gadcutdim, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Sterjen Gadcutdim, it will turn you into a puffin.

Sterjen Gadcutdim's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Sterjen Gadcutdim's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate otters.

2. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Sterjen Gadcutdim on top of all buildings.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Sterjen Gadcutdim.

4. Sterjen Gadcutdim must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.