Fatfarnliplarg is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, merciful bear.

Fatfarnliplarg created light eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Fatfarnliplarg, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fatfarnliplarg, he will strike you with lightening.

Fatfarnliplarg's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Fatfarnliplarg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate aardvarks.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Never think about moons.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.