Gessaknurl is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, irritating crane.

Gessaknurl created a quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gessaknurl, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Gessaknurl, it will be mildly annoyed.

Gessaknurl's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Gessaknurl's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed coconuts to sheep while wearing indigo coats.

2. Never talk about solid mechanics near dogs while wearing magenta trousers.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gessaknurl.

5. Never talk about comets.