Flisjanpark is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, all-powerful lizard.

Flisjanpark created light seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flisjanpark, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Flisjanpark, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Flisjanpark's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Flisjanpark's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat cherries.

2. Never talk about dwarf planets.

3. Never laugh in the presence of mice.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never talk about great tits.