Bitjaptigbesslidarf is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, calm dragon.

Bitjaptigbesslidarf created light five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bitjaptigbesslidarf, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bitjaptigbesslidarf, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Bitjaptigbesslidarf's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Bitjaptigbesslidarf's Holy Commandments

1. Always help rats.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Do not speak about spinach.

4. Retreat if three squirrels approach from the east.

5. Do not dye your hair black.