Kikpodvonk is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, intelligent dingo.

Kikpodvonk created the Tadpole Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kikpodvonk, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Kikpodvonk, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Kikpodvonk's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Kikpodvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about spacetime near pigs while wearing green skirts and balancing six aluminium spheres on your head.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near sharks while wearing gray kilts.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate whales.