Kipwaprulbugfomhakbud Talsismet Queegyarttan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, egotistical lobster.

Kipwaprulbugfomhakbud Talsismet Queegyarttan created the Sunflower Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kipwaprulbugfomhakbud Talsismet Queegyarttan, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Kipwaprulbugfomhakbud Talsismet Queegyarttan, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Kipwaprulbugfomhakbud Talsismet Queegyarttan's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Kipwaprulbugfomhakbud Talsismet Queegyarttan's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large tin sculpture of Kipwaprulbugfomhakbud Talsismet Queegyarttan on top of all buildings.

2. Never think about electromagnetism near horses while wearing brown trousers and balancing eight gold spheres on your face.

3. Never feed lots of garlic to tapirs while wearing red shorts.

4. Retreat if five cats approach from the east.

5. Do not drink water in blue rooms.