Arfhonfudgad is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, astonishing jaguar.

Arfhonfudgad created a top quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Arfhonfudgad, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Arfhonfudgad, it will boil you in a big pot.

Arfhonfudgad's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Arfhonfudgad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Aardvarks are not to be trusted.

4. Never write about planets.

5. Worship no other gods but Arfhonfudgad.