Zagmadnutkapwipwik is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, amazing alligator.

Zagmadnutkapwipwik created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zagmadnutkapwipwik, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Zagmadnutkapwipwik, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Zagmadnutkapwipwik's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Zagmadnutkapwipwik's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant magenta sculpture of Zagmadnutkapwipwik in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never wear red shorts.

3. Never paint your neck mauve.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Zagmadnutkapwipwik.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Zagmadnutkapwipwik.