Lopvonstrag is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, narcissistic frog.

Lopvonstrag created the planet Jupiter eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lopvonstrag, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Lopvonstrag, it will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Lopvonstrag's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Lopvonstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill moths.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never talk about cell theory.

5. Never think about electromagnetism near turtles while wearing pink jumpers and balancing six platinum spheres on your feet.