Fagnarlmot is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, compassionate newt.

Fagnarlmot created dark energy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fagnarlmot, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Fagnarlmot, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Fagnarlmot's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Fagnarlmot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. You must pray to Fagnarlmot five times a day.

3. Always help sick squirrels.

4. Always obey Fagnarlmot's priests.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.