Gabquam is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, temperamental parrot.

Gabquam created the cosmos seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gabquam, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gabquam, he will destroy your home solar system.

Gabquam's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Gabquam's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Learn three new languages a year.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Respect your elders.