Yartcusshen is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unsympathetic snake.

Yartcusshen created the Sunflower Galaxy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yartcusshen, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Yartcusshen, she will turn you into a hamster.

Yartcusshen's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Yartcusshen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Worship no other gods but Yartcusshen.

3. Never think about optics near horses while wearing red shorts and balancing eight gold spheres on your feet.

4. Do not eat onions.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.