Gabnat is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, smart jaguar.

Gabnat created the Sun five million years ago.

If you believe in Gabnat, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Gabnat, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Gabnat's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Gabnat's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat cucumbers.

2. Erect a giant gray sculpture of Gabnat in the centre of the settlement.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not kill badgers.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.