Hamrullen is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, self-assured wyvern.

Hamrullen created the planet Jupiter nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hamrullen, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Hamrullen, she will turn you into a tree.

Hamrullen's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Hamrullen's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about photosynthesis.

2. Never write about galaxies.

3. Retreat if nine cats approach from the west.

4. Always make sure there are no seals in a room before entering it.

5. Put Hamrullen first in all things.