Pakhatlatflat is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, boastful crow.

Pakhatlatflat created the Sombrero Galaxy six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pakhatlatflat, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Pakhatlatflat, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Pakhatlatflat's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Pakhatlatflat's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear indigo kilts.

2. Worship no other gods but Pakhatlatflat.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never think about chromosomes.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.