Femtaront is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, wise pigeon.

Femtaront created dark energy five million years ago.

If you believe in Femtaront, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Femtaront, she will try to impress you with trees.

Femtaront's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Femtaront's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Femtaront.

2. Never paint your legs violet.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never feed cucumbers to snakes while wearing boots.