Matmapfun is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, clever donkey.

Matmapfun created a Higgs boson two years ago.

If you believe in Matmapfun, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Matmapfun, she will not care at all.

Matmapfun's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Matmapfun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat cherries.

2. Erect three aluminium sculptures of Matmapfun on top of important buildings.

3. Feed all hungry tapirs.

4. Do not take Matmapfun's name in vain.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.