Wan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, self-confident pigeon.

Wan created viruses twelve years ago.

If you believe in Wan, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Wan, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Wan's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Wan's Holy Commandments

1. Always help porpoises.

2. Never go into brown rooms.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Never write about nebulae.