Konlikgidven is a god.

She takes the form of a large, contented walrus.

Konlikgidven created an electron five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Konlikgidven, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Konlikgidven, she will be very sad.

Konlikgidven's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Konlikgidven's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about solid mechanics near aardvarks while wearing violet shorts and balancing nine lead spheres on your face.

2. Do not speak about beans.

3. Never talk about foxes.

4. Always help manatees in need.

5. Konlikgidven must be the most important thing in your life.