Lagarfgov Hogbanfar is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, almighty zebra.

Lagarfgov Hogbanfar created humanity six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lagarfgov Hogbanfar, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Lagarfgov Hogbanfar, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Lagarfgov Hogbanfar's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Lagarfgov Hogbanfar's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Lagarfgov Hogbanfar in the centre of the settlement.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.