Ponfetmit Mignurtflam Cepflagquillhubzim is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, awesome spider.

Ponfetmit Mignurtflam Cepflagquillhubzim created humanity seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ponfetmit Mignurtflam Cepflagquillhubzim, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Ponfetmit Mignurtflam Cepflagquillhubzim, it will send minions to preach to you.

Ponfetmit Mignurtflam Cepflagquillhubzim's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Ponfetmit Mignurtflam Cepflagquillhubzim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moths.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never think about solid mechanics near gulls while wearing indigo tights and balancing nine silicon spheres on your head.

4. Erect a giant blue sculpture of Ponfetmit Mignurtflam Cepflagquillhubzim in the centre of the settlement.

5. Ponfetmit Mignurtflam Cepflagquillhubzim loves pigs, so they must be honoured.