Mumdisswad is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, clever tortoise.

Mumdisswad created a photon eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mumdisswad, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Mumdisswad, it will turn you into a frog.

Mumdisswad's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Mumdisswad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

2. You must love Mumdisswad.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Never talk about fire.