Sogtomfad is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, benevolent weasel.

Sogtomfad created the planet Jupiter four billion years ago.

If you believe in Sogtomfad, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Sogtomfad, she will turn you into a rat.

Sogtomfad's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Sogtomfad's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about photosynthesis.

2. Never mention tortoises.

3. Do not hurt turtles.

4. Never wear fawn tights.

5. Do not stand on grass.