Bellbissnul is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, humorless fish.

Bellbissnul created the universe three million years ago.

If you believe in Bellbissnul, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bellbissnul, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Bellbissnul's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Bellbissnul's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Always wear fawn.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bellbissnul.