Fadfutsidhom Gut is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, staggering lizard.

Fadfutsidhom Gut created time and space four billion years ago.

If you believe in Fadfutsidhom Gut, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Fadfutsidhom Gut, he will turn you into a puffin.

Fadfutsidhom Gut's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Fadfutsidhom Gut's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about thermodynamics.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never talk about gravity near mice while wearing purple scarves and balancing six zinc spheres on your neck.

4. Always help ducks.

5. Do not wear gold on your body.