Cebrigwitbell is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, bad-tempered parrot.

Cebrigwitbell created carbon two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cebrigwitbell, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Cebrigwitbell, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Cebrigwitbell's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Cebrigwitbell's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never think ill of sick capybaras.

4. Cebrigwitbell must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.